What if there could be more lovely?

Hello darlings,

I hope you find yourself feeling loved by God and loved by Jesus Christ.

No matter what, following God and Jesus and doing lovely for others are what matters in this life.

I always have something to be curious about and something to work on. It’s part of me to constantly be questioning and consistently be moving. In the midst of my movement in life being onward and forward every second, I struggle with a lot, you know, we all do. That’s what happens here, y’all. God is perfect. Jesus Christ is perfect, but He doesn’t expect us to be perfect. That doesn’t mean we don’t need to stop working on ourselves. Notice I didn’t say “try”. It’s not enough to “try” sometimes. You need to “be” and don’t pretend it’s not as easy as it is.

As of lately all the way down to today, August 30th, today’s end, where I sit and ponder on my feelings, my thoughts and my actions, I notice I continue to need to work on another specific feature about myself.
What is it?

I hope you will be able to relate to this change. We all love having someone who feels us.
What’s my predicament? My big silliness? Something I want to change?

It’s the fact that I can’t seem to ever say something remotely negative that I know, see or feel deep down or if even only by a fine line think is true, because I always want to back it up with the opposite fact of it being something more positive, more cheerful and lovely. What if admitting to negative aspects, makes them so?

I love seeing the lovely.
It’s there.

The change is not small, but could be needed.

Why?
What if I can see more lovely if I’m allowed to say what isn’t?

You see, I find myself constantly refraining from giving all that I want to conversations, decisions and ideas because I automatically pull anything that could be considered negative. Part of me does this because I deep down want to just love people, animals, places, tea, and life as much as I can and be positive for the love I am sharing.

Part of me does this because I have a fear that if I let anything negative out, that negative will end up resulting in something being worsened.

Does that make sense?

I am fearful of the thought that lingers in my head that by admitting to something that isn’t altogether optimistic, that any hankering that could be drawn from keeping the positive only aspects will diminish.

I couldn’t ever cause someone hurt.

I couldn’t ever hurt someone’s feelings on purpose.

I couldn’t ever hurt someone.

Now, I love the fact that I hope to always be honest with others. However, why can’t I seem to be honest with myself? Unless I am being honest by letting go of negative thoughts altogether and only leaving the positive to be honest about?

Honest doesn’t have to be opening up everything you say just because you think it, but don’t lie. Nonetheless, you may also know a truth and you shan’t lie to yourself if you see, feel or know it to be true. Don’t remain in a self brought ignorance because what if admitting to that truth, meant that you could process that truth, understand that truth and learn how to move forward with that truth in a positive way instead of just pushing it away.

That negative realization still may remain, but by choosing to not deal with it doesn’t solve it.

Lovely can come if you decide to go for it.

Think of the many, many instances the word “truth” is spoke about in the Bible. They are in different stories, but the word remains throughout. That word “truth” is important.

John 8:32 English Standard Version (ESV)
“32 and you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.”
Psalm 15:2 English Standard Version (ESV)
“2 He who walks blamelessly and does what is right
and speaks truth in his heart;”
Galatians 4:16 English Standard Version (ESV)
“16 Have I then become your enemy by telling you the truth?”
Ephesians 4:15 ESV 
“Rather, speaking the truth in love, we are to grow up in every way into him who is the head, into Christ,”
1 John 1:8 English Standard Version (ESV)
“8 If we say we have no sin, we deceive ourselves, and the truth is not in us.”

If God wants us to speak truth, then why do I feel bad and guilty for speaking truth to people and myself? I’m not lying by holding back, I am just not helping myself out by admitting to things that could be worked on for good, and I am possibly in a circle of lying to myself.

We can be truthful without trying to hurt others,  spreading false information on purpose, and without seeking a horrible concomitant.

In the contrary, we can be truthful by admitting to our thoughts, feelings and what we see and using that truth to try to bring about positive change for others and the places around us.

I need to rethink how I see truth. Truth is truth, what seems to matter so often is how we share it and communicate it and let it be known.

I hope you have a good night.

Good blessings.

Love,

Molly Marie 🙂

Here’s some photos of me being happy to be me. I love being silly and I love being as me as can be without placing boundaries on the way God made me and what I He loves to see.

 

 

Slowing Down and Looking Around

Hello friends,

A happy day to you is what I hope and a happy day tomorrow to follow!

A friend of mine shared some words with me that he tells his wife, “No worry, no hurry.” Firstly, knowing me, it catches my attention because it rhymes. Besides that, it catches my attention because it’s such a simple statement full of something I could certainly begin to take more notice of in my life, and actually inside my heart know I should.

He’s lived through a lot, and I find learning from generations that have experienced so much more than I, from age and what life brings, is something I can really apply to the now and think about more deeply. Why not?

My life changes very often. I love change. Currently, I’m in a change where God has blessed me with being as usual busy, but the kind of busy that I look forward too.

I love where I go, what I do, and all my stresses are exciting.

Nonetheless, that doesn’t mean I’m enjoying everything I’m doing to the fullest capability of which I want to be. Scheduling doesn’t have to be stressful. Lately, I’ve been looking less at the clock. I keep prompt, show when I need and keep on time, but there’s no much more than just continuing to “make an event”, “get somewhere and do the thing and leave” or “show up and just be there.”. Those places to be mean something and more than just ticking off a mental knowing that you made another happening on your personal planner. They mean something because you’re doing God’s work, applying yourself and working to a goal.

Then there’s the in between times. The times your by yourself and focusing on those other priorities that you don’t have to be with. Those times you can really understand that if you slow your own breathe down and let yourself realize that not everything has to be done right away, you’ll feel so much more fulfilled. Taking my time and doing what needs to be done, even if it means, elongating the time it takes by a few days, has been so refreshing to my heart lately. God has helped me through and I’m finding myself more fulfilled by each and every small to big memory in life. Thank you God. 🙂 💖❤💖

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Love,

Molly Marie ❤

Week Color Yellow

Hi darlings,

I hope you feel so full of happy, cheerful and yellow feelings coming for you this week. Those are always welcome, it’s not silly and wasteful or ignorant to be happy and it’s not at all selfish to bask in a ray of sunshine all day long.

It is innocent, but that’s not bad.

Furthermore, we cannot succeed in always manufacturing ourselves a yellow week, but we can let ourselves feel a yellow week deeply when we remember God’s blessings.

I don’t often let myself feel the feeling of negativity. I try and organize any possible doubt, hurt and less than positive thought into something that has to point north.

It doesn’t have to be that way. Negativity is okay right? It balances the positive.

I’ll learn it someday. I’m in the process now. Thankfully, I’ve realized how to study it. I’ve started to learn and let myself discover parts of my personality that I was scared to understand. The Bible, prayer and finding people in my life who lead me closer to God each day have helped.

To go deeper, if I’m not mentioning the yellow from temporary feelings, then where do I get the yellow feelings from God’s blessings from?  Well I’m currently on a pause with my preschool teaching, it hurts, my littles meant so much to me, but it was time to be finished. God blessed me with the opportunity to always go back to that job that could become lifelong and fulfilling with children if I needed. He gave me so much through my time there, learning not only how to work in the environment, have new responsibilities and teach, but how to be continue my understanding of littles to hopefully be an even better mother one day. Which being a mom and having a family is a dream of mine I hold dear.

Yet I am fully thankful with going back to the awaiting old friend of a city and studying theatre, and music and writing and science and I sum this studying into musical theatre. As well as continuing my involvement with the God blessed theatre company He had me start, The Luminescent Moon, and the other theatrical involvements I’m involved in, from planning to performing, as well as God blessing me to begin work on a Christian horse ranch helping young kids find therapy from working with horses. You may know, horses have been a passion since I was small. They are beautiful animals, bringing companionship and understanding in serene moments, to being at church and surrounding myself in community and having loving family memories and friendships and working on Bible Study and mini side workings like my poem writing and fitness endeavors and enjoying the little bit of time off I have from a day job for a couple more weeks to homemaking and baking more and above all, learning more about God and applying His Word to life and trying to help others see Him.

God brought me to a place in my life where I feel so serene in a sense that my life doesn’t feel controlled. I am doing what it is I want to do in the path that I believe God is directing me. I feel excited to be pursuing the passions He instilled without feeling any portion of my commitments being the upsetting part of obligatory or just another means to get to an end. It’s a process of enjoyment along the way.

That is overall so very yellow.

I want to talk about something happy and cheerful and yellow that happened to me this week.

I realized my innocence is a beautiful characteristic of my personality. It’s not something I need to change, cover or be embarrassed by.

From the time I was little and all growing up, I always was told how innocent I was. I have always took it as a compliment. I want to not only portray innocence, but fully be innocent. I want to see the good and do good. Innocent loving and hoping is a beautiful way to see and go about life.

Innocent in what terms?

Truly, I am innocent in all terms applied when spoken to me about innocence in my personality I believe.

Nonethless, innocence doesn’t equal childness.

I always loved being called innocent and still do.

The one thing that hurts is when I find myself thinking people don’t take my thoughts, my doings and my life respectfully.

People treat you differently when they find out you are more than your outside and sometimes I don’t let people see more than my outside and a tiny little inside. I don’t close up my doors completely, but I don’t go further to open up. I don’t share all my feelings and thoughts because not everyone deserves to hear me. I’m vulnerable and I’m fragile. I’m honest, but if people heard all of me, would they believe I’m not what they hoped?

I am strong.

Depsite the constant stress of being hurt when people disrespect me, I can forgive easily.

Forgiving. Does that mean innocence?

I do not know, but I think one of the most innocent, but understanding parts about me is my ability to forgive. Forgiving means hurt is no longer there, love is in its place. That comes from God. Thank you God.

Innocence truly helps me every day not being so hurt and not being so negative. I love living this way. Why would I want to lose that word describing my personality?

I don’t. I love being innocent. I’m 20, and free to be me, innocent and always ready for tea.

It’s yellow. It’s so yellow when I have one less thing to try and change about myself to make other people think somehow what I think is a better opinion of me.

Innocent is good.

Innocent is yellow.

Have a yellow week.

God loves you.

Good blessings.

Love,

Molly Marie 💛

 

 

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My last day of working as a littles teacher was beautiful and thank you God for such a beautiful journey working with beautiful children. ❤️

 

When Loving

Dear darlings,

Love is my favorite word.

Loving is my favorite thing to do.

Being loved is my favorite feeling from God.

Do I love everyone? I do.

Do I sometimes think this is a bad idea? No.

Does loving everyone mean I love all of their decisions? No.

Does loving everyone mean I love everything? No.

Does loving everyone mean I give excuses for actions? Yes.

Does loving everyone mean I forgive easily? Yes.

Does my loving of everyone mean I don’t often get hurt by others due to overlooking negative characteristics because of love? No.

Does loving everyone mean my capacity to love even more after I get hurt, increases? Yes.

Do I get hurt knowing not everyone loves me back? Often.

Do I know God loves me always? Always and every moment of every second.

Loving everyone is far different than just seeing only the good in someone and appreciating it. Loving everyone is vastly varied from just wanting to constantly show people they are loved. Loving everyone is not the same as just being kind to a stranger.

Loving everyone is truly difficult and I don’t do it perfectly. I never will.

God does.

I do try my best to love everyone in a way that God would be proud of. A way that God helps me do. I believe God instilled in me a yearning to feel the feeling of love deeply towards everyone here. I do care about everyone, I do want what’s best for everyone, I do think everyone deserves kindness, I do think everyone is full of potential, I do want to hug everyone and I do forgive easily.

I don’t do these things the way God does though. I believe that God doesn’t do these things and expect, EVER, to have these happenings returned to Him. I believe He is always aware that He is doing these things out of the love only He can give us. I  believe He is capable of more love than we can ever fully comprehend.

You see, I don’t always, and don’t purposely, love others because I want loved back.

Though I do long for that love back.

Whether it be a simple hug without my usual and happy initiation. Perhaps, it’s a simple action to help me out as I go about a task during the day. It could be a smile and a wave that I wasn’t expecting from a stranger.

I could go on.

I’m constantly loving on everyone and I love it. God made it easier for me than other things that I do of which are more difficult, like hmm… maybe some would say, be more “realistic”?

That’s a usual one. The truth is, I am usually rather logical in my process of going about life, I just also let myself get lost in a daydream as I go about life at the same time.

Realistic is different than logical though, I think.

Realistic in this case, some may say, I shouldn’t be so easily forgiving of everyone?

Why not? Forgiveness doesn’t mean I didn’t learn. It doesn’t mean I am being silly to let someone off the hook. It doesn’t mean I don’t move forward without any understanding of how to go about things differently in the future.

Nevertheless, there are things that are “realistic” in consideration that maybe I am not always the most adapt to. I don’t particularly like looking at the wrongs and negativeness of a person. Which in turn can cause hurt. I see it, maybe not all the time, okay, but I overlook it, focusing more on the positive and the hopeful.

I don’t think this is a fault in me. I think it is a God given love for others.

Now, I don’t think God wants me to be hurt by this sharing of love though, which is where I get into hurt. I need to work on not so much every being curious why not everyone or even many are returning the love back.

I will in small increments feel a twinge of hurt add up throughout a moment, or I will at the end of the day sit back and think about all that occurred and in this case, didn’t occur in regards of feeling loved back.

I am never alone. I always have God.

I can be with God and be on my own.

Sometimes being on my own has become more enjoyable lately because surrounding myself with others only causes disappointment. These bits of hurt that come from the not happenings of feeling loved back, only happen in the first place because I love being with people. I’m talking everybody. I love everybody, in different ways and different feelings of love encapsulate these, but I do, love everybody.

When I am on my own, I don’t have to come to any reminder that not everybody loves me the way I love them.

Does that cause more hurt?

It can, because then there is no chance of letting someone love me back.

I know God always loves me though and wants me to continue loving the way He hopes for me to.

It would be nice if once in a while I didn’t let myself get hurt knowing it doesn’t mean someone doesn’t love me if they don’t show it the way I do.

It would be neat if I could know that it doesn’t matter if someone else out there doesn’t love me in return because the love I showed them is still beautiful and makes God proud. Remember, God still loves us.

It would be nifty if I could always know that the hurt I feel from not feeling loved in return by those folks is a false idea I construed in my head because so many do love me.

My hurt stems from the hope that one day I feel the kind of love from others that I give without hesitation or sometimes with, so happy to do so, and not even expect it and then not receive it when I, let myself think I would have it.

It is okay though.

Not only did God give me the love of loving others, but He gave me hope.

I do get love back. I do get that hug and I do get that smile and wave and I do get the helpful actions from others. They are there between the hurts and the not understandings. They are there.

I will always hope that they continue to happen.

One thing is for certain, I know God will always love me back.

God loves you.

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Love,

Molly Marie 💖

 

Week Color Tea Green

Hi folks!

I hope you’re happy. I’m happy.

Emotions are all over with me all the time. There is the present consistency of living my life in a joyful way because I love God so much and all He has provided. That is always there. I have that joy always.

The emotions pertaining to my feelings, or moments and what is happening in life are not consistent all the time. Currently, I’ve been back and forth and here and there and everywhere with trying to figure out the way I’m feeling and what to do and why there is a how I’m so sure of some feelings and with others, I feel so uncertain about.

I take note of other’s and my own feelings regarding situations from tiny to large everyday. It’s not only fascinating to learn how other people feel, but it is so helpful to be able to put yourself by them emotionally and maybe help them. That’s fulfilling.

It is also helpful for my own self to understand my feelings and try and thoroughly process them to the best of my current ability. I do this to not only feel better, to learn how to help others, but to hopefully make decisions based upon the logic of the situation and the feelings all coming together.

What’s one feeling I’ve processed lately? Well, just this week I attended the Alive Festival. That’s a Christian music festival.

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 Worshipping God makes my heart so very happy. Sharing His love makes my heart grin all so huge. Loving God and knowing His love for us makes my heart full, full, full. ❤️

One of my favorite things about the random and usual and ever increasing adventures I go on is experiencing new things, of course! Well not only new things in the adventures themselves, but seeing different people and how they interact in different environments. I love classic, experiencing to be put simply. 

At Alive yesterday, it was quite absorbing to not only see how different people worshipped the Lord in a much larger group and atmosphere than I am used to, but to be apart of it. I go to a tiny church though beautiful, and I’ve only been to quaint or maybe medium churches and small ones for the most part. I love the intimacy of worship within those churches. I love the way there is a quieter yet still passionate love being praised to God even without as many voices. 

Yesterday at Alive I experienced a just as passionate love being praised to God, but with a rather giant crowd who all were just as lost in the moment with only loving God in their hearts. There were more voices. 

I love people, but I for once felt like the quiet girl again, just swaying and swaying and loving God. 

Lately that’s been happening with me and it’s something I’ve taken notice of. I tend to be with people a lot. From my job with sweet children to my theatre company and everything I run around and do in between and college and you know, my woodland critter friends out in the forest being cute. I have been feeling more okay being not alone, always with God, but being on my own. One of my many fears used to be isolation. It was huge. I was so scared of being isolated overall in life. Though, now, isolation hasn’t even lingered on my mind as something to stress over for quite sometime. I’m finding I’m serene being on my own and lately it’s made moments like Alive yesterday more impactful as I was not alone, no, not by any means, but I was happy to be surrounded by folks who were all coming together to celebrate never being alone because we always have God. ❤️

This feeling of learning how I find isolation not a scary feeling anymore, but one to enjoy, and want to be in when the moments occur, is so beautiful. I know I’m with God and He is letting me be on my own in the moment. Letting me be with Him. It’s beautiful and it’s so much tea green.

Tea green isn’t dark, it isn’t light, it’s a medium sort of green that also has a little air of brown. It’s a nice green, believe me. I’m sure you can picture your favorite shade of green, well this isn’t mine, but it’s one of them. This shade of green reminds me of fear and with God, learning how to let fears go. It’s tea green. Tea is refreshing. God’s love and hope for us is the most refreshing of all.

Have a beautiful night folks, and please enjoy a cup of tea if you feel the sweet need!

Love,

Molly Marie 🙂 💖

 

Week Color Light Blue

Dear deers,

I hope you’re happy. I hope you’re feeling relaxed. I hope you feel the love God has for you.

This week in particular has been an utterly light blue shade. Blue can be so many feelings from feeling down to feeling alright to feeling cheery to feeling hope.

This week it’s just a bit of all of that, but primarily I’m feeling understanding. I’m feeling soothed by God’s gift of helping me look behind me and being glad I was the way I was, so I know how much He brought me through, showed me, helped me become who I am now, and not feel hurt or downtrodden by the seeming pitfulls, pressures and pains of the past, but hopeful I will now have a better understanding of the excitement of the future He has planned for us.

I tend to be a nostalgic person. I used to get so caught up in feelings I once felt, whether it be from the love I had for a certain passion or the feelings I had being around certain people who make me glad I am around the correct place to meet them. I couldn’t let myself believe that the future was full of feelings I didn’t even yet know I could experience, and that I would always find those feelings again, but even more, more beautiful ones that God had waiting.

I’m a huge feeling person. I love feeling. I take small moments and let myself feel them to the fullest. One thing I do all of the time is look around me when I’m outside, my true habitat. I look around, take in the scent of the flowers swaying their scent in the wind, hearing the birdies chirping their sweet tunes and watch the green hues of leaves flourish in the wind, back and forth, back and forth. I enjoy this moment and enjoy that I feel nothing, but love and comfort in God’s beautiful life given to us.

I love feeling and truthfully, I know deep in me that God is always providing more beautiful feelings than I can currently predict.

Though there are moments when I am so throughout me happy, and happy is not a word that should be taken lightly. I mean, happy is a strong word. It isn’t always an easy thing to be happy, but it is the feeling I love so much because I find myself choosing it day after day. Those moments when I am so throughout me happy are moments when I think I’ll never feel the same sort of happy again. Those moments pass and all I want is to grab them back.

When I was a senior in high school I found myself having new freedoms, becoming more independent and learning more about what God was bringing in my future. I had this feeling of fascination at what was in store. This then led into a year I unexpectedly found new feelings from. Feelings of every color seemed to ensue except that they didn’t.

These past two years were full of feelings that I continully let myself embrace inside of me, trying to understand what I was going through, why I may or may not have enjoyed a specific feeling and what I wanted to change. I ended up learning so much from God.

Throughout this time there are many memories associated with different places and events and doings.

Driving down certain roads on a dark night with my window down and music on and the smell of a warm breeze drifting through my window can bring upon memories of relaxed periods after being with friends at an event.

Walking down a trail under spring weather nature growth, given to us by God, looking at the beauty He grew is all around in a place I used to walk feeling so lost and all so speechlessly happy and curious in the times of my past, brings back those days I was a younger girl who didn’t know what she was about to encounter. Thank you God. 🙂 💖

I’ve gotten those feelings again lately, and those are two happenings of them happening. I was brought back to a more happy me, maybe a more melancholy me or maybe just a more less understanding me. No matter what, it used to hurt more remembering those times. It doesn’t hurt so much anymore. Why? God has not only healed me, but has shown me that I am always being given more beautiful feelings by Him.

I am still curious, I am still happy and I am still hopeful.

Faith is a beautiful way to not feel blue by the past in a negative way, but to feel blue by the past in an understanding way.

God helped me to understand and now I have more to learn, and I cannot wait for God to help us on our way.

Good blessings!

Love,

Molly Marie 🙂

 

Month Color Yellow, but in a Butter Way

Dear dears,

It’s May. It is spring and not only are the flowers blooming colorfully around us and are trees growing their luscious leaves of green and birds continue singing their chirps through the morning breeze, but life is starting again. That’s what spring is, a new beginning of the seasonal changes in regards to growth in a simple sense. Spring also seems to be the time of year that people begin to become a bit happier in an all around purport, this is most likely due to the fact that the sun is shining more so and the temperature is a typical of folk comfortable to let loose outside more. Nature is truly a place of peace for many people including myself. Spring brings newness, spring brings refreshment and this means change.

Nonetheless, I am not feeling it in the way I have before, that “newness”, but I am feeling it in a way I always wanted.

Most springs, well springs that I can specifically remember, my life has always undergone huge change around this time of year. We can be simple in this change and for a reference let’s be nostalgic and go back to me being freshly 18 and just graduating high school. You can imagine, that is a change. I now have decisions to make on what I am going to do with my life going forward, and it isn’t that I didn’t before, but I had more ability to let myself do completely what I wanted, finally. To add, considering the way I am, I had many ideas, many whirring possibilities, and dream upon dream forming.

Are my bigger life changes due to the fact it is spring or just coincidence? I think it is a bit of both. However, I come to expect spring to always be the time my life starts taking on a new color, as I usually think. This year it didn’t. I always wanted my life, or at least just for a little while in my life, sometimes, to feel at ease, and stable when it comes to my emotions. My life in the past was usually so full of drama, and emotions tend to run high, I make my life dramatic, I get involved in dramatic occurrences and life happenings, and I make my own personal thoughts dramatic. Dramatic doesn’t necessarily mean negative, but it makes life different, maybe overwhelming at times, or maybe even more exciting too.

Well, I suppose a part of my pink year and feeling that sweet feeling of pink I know God is giving me, is also feeling serene.

Don’t get me wrong, I love feeling serene and find it so often in small moments in my day, like seeing the moon stare down at me, shining with nothing, but the sound of crickets and God’s calming presence with me, or sitting outside, covered by the branches of trees above me, busy with squirrels and photosynthesis. Okay, see? Nature is peace bringing. Anywho, I almost had to purposely search for those moments of serenity, (I just wrote a one act play for college called “Collecting Serene Moments”, that is a fun fact for your day) or stumble upon them and appreciate them as much as I could, knowing God gave them each to me to love.

Now I have a stable feeling of serenity in my everyday life and foreseeable future. The serene feeling isn’t as strong as the serene moments I feel when I am out looking at the moon, but it’s a serene feeling of serene. It isn’t a loud color, it is a toned down color, it is butter yellow.

You see, my life has become stable due to the fact that God’s purpose for me is aligning with my passions, and my passions are aligning with God’s purpose for me and I am purposefully trying to grow myself in His purpose for me. I don’t feel so unsure right now on what He wants for me. I love that, and I am working at it.

I am finished with another semester of college today. I found out I get to teach drama to kids continuing to work at the school I am an APS teacher at currently for the summer, which means I don’t HAVE to or even WANT to change jobs again, for the time being. If you know me, I am not scared to change jobs. Scratch that, I am sometimes scared, well I feel bad, but I still change jobs if I feel God is calling me to. It’s nice to not change jobs though and be excited about the future of my job. It’s exciting to know that if I want to finish up school, most of my schooling is done, now I can focus on majority of ONLY classes pertaining to theatre and performance, unless I decide upon journalism or science still. You never know. Again, scratch that. I never know.

Besides school and my job, my life outside of those two things, isn’t really out of usual right now, which is very strange for me. For one thing, now that I have, oh my goodness, you don’t know probably anything that has happened in the last about 2 months unless you actually know me, which I knew, I just said oh my goodness for dramatic effect (see? I like some dramatic vibes, unless maybe I don’t anymore as I am on this serenity wave? Oooh, waves are serene, okay bye, except not bye because I am still writing), but I have my own theatre company now, which I shared, but I also got to perform in New York City in an off off Broadway skit, which I will have to share as it was what I believe is a God given glimpse into what will be if I keep working hard, but understand that now isn’t the time, keep the dream going, but work where I am at. Ontop of that some very beautiful blessings have come regarding The Luminescent Moon from getting to connect with thrilled folks on the fact that my hometown is having a theatre company, to getting to let the word be shared of my talented crew and cast of The Diary of Anne Frank in a huge newspaper, written so kindly and thoroughly, to getting to have my first radio interview to share the word of my crew and cast yet again and their beautiful talents and to finally getting God’s gift of sharing the crew and cast’s hard work and beautiful talents with my hometown at a historic and beautiful theatre. Thank you God. ❤

Now I am planning our next show already, and I was practically offered a sweet role in a somewhat dream or goal show with a huge possibility in my hometown and all the excitement my theatre life seems to bring I don’t only do theatre, outside of my life of theatre, my own personal life is also serene. I go to work, while my job is challenging, it is meaningful, I find myself experiencing so many small stories of my littles and I find it rewarding to hopefully make an impact in their young lives. I look forward to college as a future training experience to open doors if I go back full time with classes pertaining completely to what I decide. I look forward to the fact that God gave me my piece of rewarding passion that I needed while being in Ohio. A while ago I was struggling on finding out why God wanted me to stay in Ohio. The constant back and forth and change I was undergoing here was becoming silly to me, I didn’t get where I was going and why I wasn’t going where I thought I should be. God gave me this job that I want to keep for the time being so I can really work in the lives of the children through my passion that I find theatre being so important in sharing stories of humans with others, He gave me my college possibility of looking exciting and not boring, but full of hope, He gave me my company to bring more of my passion to the hometown I grew up in and do what I want to do with it, I get to decide with Him every step of the way. He gave me the opportunity to become more involved with the church I attend, to sing and worship Him. I hope to grow in ministry. He gave me kind friendships and the feeling of not being alone. I love being alone, I do, but I don’t feel so alone right now. I feel apart of something, I don’t know what, but it’s neat to feel this way. He brought me a sense of serenity, I am not worried much, I am living in the moment more so, and I will let it stay for now. He gave me a blessing and it’s yellow, a butter yellow, and I could say it “butter” stay for the sense of a pun, but if my life changed once more, I wouldn’t be surprised and if I end up as a rancher in Utah next week, I’d be along for the ride. Literally, if I am a rancher I may be riding a horse.

Life is pink, and it is the pink I knew God was giving me this year. It is sweet pink. I didn’t quite realize serenity was going to be so sweet. I love it.

So with my life feeling stable and I don’t currently anticipate WANTING at the moment to make any big changes, for once, I welcome the serenity fully. I welcome the stability for now. The stability I think prepares me for the adventure that lies ahead. Thank you God. He is amazing. Jesus Christ is amazing. I love them.

I hope you feel serene and good blessings friends, until next time? I hope next time is sooner this time. I do.

Love,

Molly Marie 🙂

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